If you ever argued about anything, then you know that a happy-ending requires the two of you to communicate until you reach a resolution where both parties feel heard and understood…so peace can be restored. Only and until you both get satisfied in some way, do you walk away with some consideration of peace. Or do you?
If you ever had an argument where you received no satisfaction from the result, then you probably know what it feels like to be resentful, angry, agitated, and discarded. But what if it doesn’t have to be that way?
What if you could be the relationship advocate, the champion of sorts? Would that be enough to allow the other person to get everything they want from that particular situation or argument, while you walk away with nothing but your generosity? Maybe!
What if you believed with great certainty that giving into one particular crisis could potentially lead to a completely new sort of relationship…because of that give? Would you do it? Would you be satisfied?
I guess it all depends on the topic at hand, but there will always be situations, arguments, and relationships that get heated, misunderstood, or go south, so how you decide to pursue the moment determines the outcome.
Perhaps you could decide to step back from one situation in order to get another. You can always try to make everything better, fight to the bitter end, or choose to step out of a situation or relationship, but whatever you choose, you are left to pick up whatever is left…the consequences of those choices.
Before offering your reaction, I suggest you sit quietly; not in your own thoughts necessarily, but to a place of peace. Allow the problem to be placed on a shelf for the moment so that you can gather yourself. Sit with yourself…quietly. Be ‘in the now’ by seeing the world as a whole instead of a small piece. Give yourself time; not to dwell on the tidbits of the issue, but rather the chance for the answer to come to you…naturally.
If you take the time to sit quietly, in the moment, what you find is that how you feel about a problem now, versus how you felt about it then, may be very different. When you allow emotions to calm down, time to pass, and tend to your soul with love and care, you realize that the smallest issues only need to be huge when you give them the drive of your emotions. After a time, you can decide how to react and what choices to make in the situation, but for now, in the moment, just be still.
With every action, there is generally a reaction…whenever possible, be delayed in yours.
To read more on dating, relationships, family and friends, check out my book, Loving with Purpose, or go to any of the following links…